Friday, December 10, 2010

SEPARATION: The Absentee Era (2006 to 2010)

SONG - Every/Sum Body

The post-Powerhouse momentum ceased abruptly when the boys went their separate ways at the end of the summer of 2006. Mason left James Madison High School to study at James Madison University. Jay left the country to grow a beard and ride dirt bikes in Paraguay. And Paul was kicked out of his parents' house and forced to live with Russians in a Falls Church slum called MIR II.

Tasked with planning their annual holiday performance drummerless, Paul and Mason had to reconsider their live show on account of Jay's subequatorial sabbatical. Mason, who had been experimenting with Garageband, sequenced backing drum parts for that show. The performance itself also featured a computer-voiced narrator, FDR-esque fireside chat props, and was presented more like a television holiday special than a traditional rock show. Though unpolished, awkward, and poorly received, the show found the Catscan exploring new concepts and taking bigger risks than they had in years.

This step outside the comfort zone paid off when they polished the concept through the Future EP and subsequent "Future Shows" in 2007. Catscan recorded a concept EP of songs written about the year 3000, produced digitally with almost no live instrumentation. It was released on their website for free download and sold physically at the release show. For this performance, and subsequent Future Shows, they re-re-recruited Eric Randall, who had since become interested in electronic dance music. Randall's DJing, along with hip outfits and lighting, brought more of a club feel to these shows. Having pre-recorded backing music forced the band to do more to keep the crowd entertained, including choreographed dance moves, intricate futuristic costumes, and elaborate props.

With Jay's return in the summer of 2007, Catscan began work on a new project. They planned to release a soundtrack album to a zombie movie which they were also writing, both based loosely on The Beatles' Help!. It would be called Kelp!.

As their next Christmas show approached, Mason and Paul found themselves Jayless once again. Though they were content with the experiment that was the Future Shows, Catscan decided to take another big risk by doing the exact opposite. Instead of scaling down to a two-man all electric show, they brought on an additional seven musicians to do an entirely acoustic performance. Four euphoniums, three singers, two guitarists, one percussionist, and an ape played to a surprisingly large audience.

Meanwhile, progress on the Kelp! project slowed to a crawl. Although many songs were written as well as an entire storyboard and part of a script, the project ultimately grew too large in scope for Catscan to handle, and was re-imagined as a half-documentary, half-horror comedy in the style of another Beatles' movie, Let It Be. The title, Get It Free, would also coincide with the launch of their new website which would offer their entire discography online for free. Though Catscan filmed hours of mostly boring footage for the movie, this project too was ultimately scrapped.

The band reconvened briefly in 2009 to record a radio special for WVCW, VCU's college radio station in Richmond. This recording never aired. However, DJ Gonzi and cohorts did play a few Catscan songs and, in keeping with tradition, perpetuated the promotion of misinformation about the band and its members.

At the end of the summer of 2009, Mason&Paul finished up a collaborative transatlantic EP with Richy&Georgie called The War in Arach. The songs were built from samples traded back and forth across the pond, and had a completely different feel than the Future EP and any previous Catscan album due to the bizarre contributions of their british counterparts.

Catscan played one final show as a trio in December of 2009 for the Catscan Solutions, Inc. Mandatory Holiday-Themed Office Party which featured a few new songs and an auto-tuned Christmas karaoke session.

In 2010, there were no shows and no new recordings released. Mason and Paul spent most of the year organizing and archiving all of their work to date: their long history as a band, their extensive discography, their many live performances, their greatest accomplishments, as well as their massive failures. Catscan sat down and chronicled all of it into the very words you are reading. The Absentee Era ends with this sentence. This one, not that last one.

Monday, December 6, 2010

MANIFEST DESTINY: The Powerhouse Era (2003 to 2006)

SONG - Reagan's Ghost

Catscan played a showcase with "5 mad punk bands" at nationally renowned Jammin' Java, a snooty proto-hipster coffee shop, on October 9th, 2003. This opportunity came through mentor Jon Carroll, who joined Catscan on stage for a live rendition of Carroll's Living in an Insane Asylum. This performance also featured David Shelby who had co-written the song with Jon years before. The headlining act, Further From, shared their drum set and guitar with Catscan- who's own equipment broke just before and during their performance. The band thanked their gracious hosts by informing the audience that the show was over and to "go home" just before the headlining act took the stage. Due to this faux-pas, Catscan never heard from Further From, or Jammin’ Java, ever again.

A few new compositions from their yet-to-be-recorded next album were field tested at the Jammin' Java show as well as their second Battle of the Bands at James Madison High School. The following week, Catscan played another Battle at the school’s after prom party, although they were too young to have actually attended the prom itself. They won second place, one hundred dollars, and a free VHS of themselves lip-syncing to Welcome to the Jungle.

Paul was sent off to a prestigious music and arts camp in Michigan that summer of 2004 to study euphonium. Catscan was put on a temporary hiatus, leaving Mason to explore a few other musical ventures. He started a new band with Eric Randall and Khai Phan, a satirical screamo group called Fallen August. Their tongue-in-cheek sarcastic emo music gained them much MySpace fandom, as well as several uncomfortably awkward gigs. Mason and Jay also wrote and recorded an EP called The Romans without Paul and mailed it to him at Interlochen. Shortly after Paul's triumphant return, the band recorded Based on a Fake Story, perhaps their first true classic. Mason, Paul, and Jay put almost a year's worth of effort in writing, practicing, and recording, a radical change from their rougher and more spontaneous recording style.

Catscan started a new tradition of annual holiday extravaganzas with 2005's Christmas on the Planet of the Apes show in Mason's basement, which featured the first appearance by Santa Ape. Because it lacked the technical and performance issues of all their prior gigs, the band felt that this was their first well-received show. Many who attended the show as classmates and friends of the group, left as fans.

The band briefly recruited Drew Gingras, a talented young guitarist, in late 2005, enabling Mason to concentrate more on keyboards and adding another layer to the band's live sound. However, Drew's external obligations to other bands left him under prepared for his first and only performance with Catscan, who decided to revert back to a trio, parting amiably with their friend. While recording their follow-up to Based on a Fake Story, Catscan also grew interested in video and visual media. They filmed several music videos for both Catscan and Fallen August as well as including the experimental horror film, Midgetville with members of the Project Grapefruit Collective.

William Henry Harrison came out at the end of their high school careers. This album felt much darker than any of their previous works. Paul's unavailability gave Mason executive control of the project, who in turn produced a much more aggressive and experimental album. Mason and Paul also recorded a live-in-studio piece called Nostradamus Predicted Hitler with Eric Randall, Khai Phan, and Jeff Smith, which was even more free-form.

Having graduated high school, and with two solid albums under their belts, Catscan began putting press kits together in order to go public. They recorded a split, Yellow Cat, with Yellow People. The two bands played many shows together and formed an indie label, Kaiju Records, for which they also recruited The Norman Rockwells, MC Stonewall Hill, and Richy&Georgie. Catscan's web presence was also gaining steam through emerging social networking avenues and their own website, developed by Marco Ceppi. Mason, Paul, and Jay started preparations for a tour of the east coast, armed with professionally shot photography of the band as well as a collection of their best material. They named this demo collection Manifest Destiny, and felt ready to conquer the music world.

Monday, November 29, 2010

BRITISH INVASION: The Transitional Era (2003)

SONG - Election Day

Freshman year of high school, Paul befriended faux-British rapscallion, Jay Swanson. Paul duped Jay into thinking that he was a Canadian and, due to their shared fake connection to Her Royal Highness, they bonded. Coincidentally, Mason and Jay were also previously acquainted through their church’s youth breakfasts, watching The Truman Show and breakfast burrito eating contests.

At the time, Catscan was auditioning many talented young drummers in search of a fourth human member. None made any meaningful connection with Mason, Paul, or Jeff. It became apparent that personal chemistry was more important than technical ability during the auditions.

Jay, who also worked with Mason on the Hawk Talk staff and dabbled in roguish shenanigans with Paul in the Ratskulls, heard about the tryouts and mentioned that he owned an old drum set. Although he didn't know how to play, and had no musical background whatsoever, Jay pulled the dusty set out of his attic and practiced for a formal audition. Though significantly worse, technically, than many of the other drummers, Jay's enthusiasm and like-minded worldview won him the spot in Catscan. He vowed to hone his skills and study music theory in order to become a more competent and contributing band member.

Jay, Jeff, Mason, and Paul only recorded one CD together, The Candidates, a politically-charged rock album, inaccurately quoted in the Hawk Talk as "for your brain, because it's real". However, during these sessions, the four members were only in the same room together once. Jeff's long distance relationship was not working, and the others eventually came to the sad conclusion that it would be best to become a power trio. Jeff was forced into retirement shortly after the release of The Candidates. E.D. was also phased out around the same time.

As Jay's drumming prowess grew, so did Catscan's concentration. Rather than simply writing and recording, the focus shifted to rehearsal for another gig… opening for a loud Floridian band at the biggest venue in town.

Friday, November 26, 2010

BOOYA: THE JEFF SMITH ERA (2002 to 2003)

SONG - On Line


Red disbanded in early 2002. However, its two members, Jeff Smith and Eric Randall, remained musically active with Catscan, though they were not granted official membership. As the collaborations grew more and more frequent, it seemed as if the quartet was destined to eventually merge into one supergroup. But Paul and Mason feared that with added egos, certain issues regarding the band's name and artistic direction would come into play. Their vision for the band up to this point had been very singular, which made Catscan somewhat xenophobic when it came to such matters. Despite their trepidation, they weren't so stubborn as to waste the unique chemistry they shared with their former "nemeses".

Mason, Paul, Eric, and Jeff often rehearsed, and recorded, as a traditional rock band- two guitars, bass, and live drum set. Several songs with this lineup were written and recorded for an internet community dedicated to their favorite Super Nintendo RPG, Earthbound. Several recordings with Eric’s drumming wound up on Catscan's albums MetalHead and Mechanical Advantage.

This intense period of collaboration came to a climax when the quartet found an opportunity in socialite playboy Sean Kenny, who was planning to have a big house party. He asked Catscan to headline this event, who in turn asked Eric and Jeff to help them put on their biggest show ever. The band practiced feverishly for this event, having learned that an ill-prepared show can never be a success. All of their practicing was made moot, however, when Eric announced his decision to not participate in the show mere days before the event. This forced Mason, Paul, and Jeff to do a complete overhaul of the show with an alternate percussionist. If it weren't for E.D., they would have been forced to cancel it entirely.

Although the performance itself was modest at best, the overall experience proved to Paul and Mason that Jeff would make a great addition to Catscan. He possessed the perfect balance of talent, personality, and reliability, allowing him to fit perfectly into band's core artistic vision. Additionally, Jeff was left-handed, which made the band more symmetrical. Mason and Paul asked Jeff to write a song as initiation, solidifying his membership, which was featured on the next album. Now a four-piece, like The Beatles or The Ninja Turtles, Catscan felt more like a real band than ever. Mason on keyboard, Paul on bass, Jeff on guitar, and E.D. on drums.

Starting their freshman year at James Madison High School was sort of a rebirth for the group, allowing them a clean slate and a fresh start, which, in part, inspired their self-titled 2002 album, Catscan!. Sadly, Jeff’s relocation to Manassas that summer decreased his availability, and involvement, somewhat. However, he remained an important member and joined the band on-stage for a Battle of the Bands in 2003. Although Catscan did not win first place, their performance stood out among the other more generic garage bands who participated. They played to their widest audience ever and were featured prominently in the school newspaper's coverage of the event. The Hawk Talk also started a new tradition of misquoting and misrepresenting the group.

Although they didn't know it, this would be Catscan’s very last performance with Jeff.

Monday, November 22, 2010


Frustrated with lackluster performances and overall poor reception, the band considered the advice of their peers- Catscan needed to get a drummer. They were determined to be taken seriously and knew they had to dispel their image as "that little band" by adding another player to the ensemble. Reluctant to conform, they found a way to both satisfy the standard set by 90's rock bands and maintain their artistic integrity by recruiting non-thinking and non-human percussionist Electronic Device, henceforth referred to as E.D., a Yamaha keyboard with pre-set drum loops and license-free auto accompaniment. E.D. provided a steady and reliable foundation for the band's music during this period.

The trio began work on their first compact disc that summer. At the same time, their ex-band mate, Eric Randall, alongside left-handed euphoniumist, Jeff Smith, founded their own rock band, Red. Although they were rivals on occasion, Catscan and Red also worked in tandem. Following the tragic events of September 11th, 2001, the two bands came together on September 12th to record two compositions in an act of patriotic resilience: Ramen and Cup o' Noodles and Kickball. The songs were featured on both of the band's first CDs, Catscan's Cats I've Known and Red's self-titled debut album.

Sadly, the band continued to struggle when it came to live performance during this era. Many of the studio techniques simply proved too complex to be replicated live. An ambitious undertaking, the infamous Thoreau Middle School Generator Breakfast taught Catscan many valuable lessons, including Murphy's law. Faulty sound equipment, squeally microphones, shoddy instruments, and unprepared guest musicians attributed to Catscan's biggest on-stage train wreck of all time. Paul felt the effects of PTSD and crippling stage fright while Mason vowed to learn from their mistakes and move forward. E.D. seemed the least phased by the debacle.

On the opposite end of the spectrum, Mason and Paul began playing open mic night at a local coffee shop, Jammin' Java. These performances, unlike the nightmarish and Hindenburg-esque disaster that was the Generator Breakfast, found Catscan stripped down to their most basic, all-acoustic elements-- guitar, euphonium, and singing. By eliminating most elements that could go wrong in a performance, little did. These minor victories gave the band some much needed confidence. Catscan began preparing for another larger-scale rock show, with Eric Randall and Jeff Smith, as a four piece collaboration. The Little Band era was coming to a close.

Friday, November 19, 2010



It was the new millennium, and like their country, which was changing around them, it was a new beginning for Paul and Mason. That summer, the duo made the decision to change their name to Catscan, because Earwacks was a pretty stupid, awful name. The band still found it difficult to produce anything, however, given the fact that they had no means of recording.

Finally, in October of that same year, with one drum and a small keyboard, the band wrote and performed their first song at the town community center near the bike path, in hopes that passersby might hear their music. Next, they went to Paul's grandma's house and recorded the song along with others they had written in shop class on an old dual cassette deck they found in her basement. This first recording, My Bad, the title itself an apology for the lack of quality both sonically and technically, marks Catscan's very first album. The first copy ever was sold for a half-pack of gum to one of their peers in that very same shop class at Henry David Thoreau Middle School.

For their next album, which was also written and recorded in a single day, Catscan recruited Mason's close friend, Eric Randall, to play guitar and sing back-up. Eric also worked closely with Mason in writing and recording The Joy of the Guitar, which celebrated Catscan's first rock instrument. Paul was mysteriously absent from this session. Catscanime and its follow-up, Nebulicious, were never released for reasons unknown today. Eric unfortunately left the band due to "creative differences" after the Nebulicious session.

Once again a duo, Catscan continued to release marginally higher quality cassette tapes which they sold for actual money; three dollars each.

The Rocket Party, an end-of-the-school-year celebration, was the first of many blunderous, ill-received public performances by the band during their early years. This was due in part to their shoddy equipment and audiences filled with disruptive and unforgiving pre-teens who literally sabotaged the band mid-performance. It seemed that the Gods, like their peers, were against them. Another gig opportunity came when Paul's sister invited them to perform at her high school graduation pool party. This second live outing was better received, perhaps due to the slightly more forgiving and mostly non-disruptive older audience, who were likely pre-occupied with water noodles.

Catscan found guidance in two mentors, Jon Carroll and Richard Sanger. Carroll, an old family friend, donated old recording equipment as well as sage advice which vastly improved the band's sound. Sanger, Paul and Mason's middle school band director, taught them music theory and the importance of discipline in performance. Without a doubt, they were the two most influential adults on the impressionable boys, aside from Mason's supportive parents who gave up their basement for the cause.

The band's sound was maturing exponentially. Each release was better than the last in songwriting, production, and performance. By the time their last cassette, C:/Robo-Stick, was released, Catscan felt it had developed far enough to abandon the already outdated medium of the cassette tape, and move onto compact discs.

Sunday, November 14, 2010



Mason Daniel Shelby. Raised in historic Vienna, Virginia, he was one of two twin boys born to David Arthur Shelby and his wife Allison Larie in October of '87. Always a curious child, his initial interest in insects ironically developed into a paralyzing phobia. Mason loved to draw and longed to one day be a cartoonist. At an early age, young Mason worked as an understudy beneath some of Vienna's foremost pianists. Though it ‘twas trying at times, the experience planted a musical seed which began to grow and grow.

Paul Nicholas Tsiaperas. The son of a draperymund, John Keith Tsiaperas, and poet, Denise Devries, little Paul was the youngest of three. Though he had a penchant for causing trouble in the classroom, he was a moderately bright boy who used his right brain more often than his left. Against his will, Paul was enrolled in the school wind instrument corps and studied euphonium, the tuba's unpopular cousin. He liked orca whales and dreamt of becoming a marine biologist. These interests would one day inspire some of his magnum opuses.

Paul and Mason met in Mrs. Simpson's kindergarten class at Cunningham Park Elementary School but only became close friends in the third grade when the two collaborated on a rain forest themed science poster. This was the tiny spark which started the fire of comradery and a friendship which would last a lifetime. The two proceeded to work on an extracurricular project, The Book, which was a collection of short stories and poems by some of the more creative students in their class. There were several volumes of The Book, all which, unfortunately, have been lost in time. However, the spirit and verve with which the boys wrote and illustrated The Books was just a glimpse of their future glory.

In the sixth grade, during an otherwise uneventful lunch hour, Paul nonchalantly proposed an idea which started simply as a means to woo their female classmates.

"My friend Mason, Dude, we should start a band. Your faithful friend, P. N. Tsiaperas, Esquire"

Mason liked Paul's suggestion, and though the two possessed no instruments and little knowledge of songwriting, they began composing simple melodies and lyrics under the moniker Earwacks. Their debut album and hit single was to be named Q-Tip. Other titles included Fast Food, You Tore My Heart Out, and Scooters. Although no songs were ever recorded and no documents from that period remain, this was truly the pre-cursor to Catscan.

Saturday, November 13, 2010

My Bad 2010: Ten Years of Catscan


Tune in to the Internet Mondays and Fridays for your bi-weekly installments as narrated by Arthur "Big Daddy" Shelby, featuring new recordings of ancient songs and other rare artifacts from each era.

Episode 1 - EARWACKS: The Pre-Catscanbrian Era
Episode 2 - MAD BAD: The Cassette Tape Era
Episode 3 - ARMS RACE: The Little Band Era
Episode 4 - BOOYA: The Jeff Smith Era
Episode 5 - BRITISH INVASION: The Transitional Era
Episode 6 - MANIFEST DESTINY: The Powerhouse Era
Episode 7 - SEPARATION: The Absentee Era
Episode 8 - THE FUTURE: The Unknown Era

ABCDE! A Big Catscan Decennial Extravaganza on December 18th

Tuesday, June 22, 2010


Catscan once performed at the now legendary Jammin' Java six years ago... today, we were asked to return on July 21st, 2010.

There is a catch- we need to sell at least 20 tickets for the show. I am not sure whether or not this is doable, so I am putting this out there to see how much interest there'd be in seeing Catscan perform at Jammin' Java if you had to pay like $8.

Calling all fans! Calling all friends! Calling everyone!! Can you help us in our time of need?

Wednesday, April 7, 2010


Ok munds! This is it! Problem fixed! This one's for real! Download the game now on the RPG page!!!! Download the readme if you need help! GO!!


Monday, April 5, 2010


Yay! I told you I'd have it up today! Sorry it took so long. Now all you have to do is download and install it. It's so easy. Just go to the RPG page and click the button to download the demo. Don't hesitate to click the other button for instructions on how to do it. And if you really have a hard time figuring this stuff out, email me at and I will walk you through it.



Friday, April 2, 2010

New Demo April 5th!

Guess what munds?

The new Catscan RPG demo is gonna be available monday (4/5/10)! There's a lot of awesome new stuff to look forward to, and it's gonna come with a readme so you can tell your grandma how to load! It's gonna rock! Get ready for it!

- Paul

Sunday, March 21, 2010

New and improved RPG demo coming soon!

Hey my little mundlingtons,

Guess what! Remember how I posted a demo of the Catscan game that everyone complained was too big (129 MBs) and took too long to download (15 minutes)? Ooh jeez!

Well I'm working on a new and improved demo which will be smaller and faster so you have no excuse but to download and enjoy it. I've also fixed a lot of the bugs and most of the typos and there's even more fun stuff to do than before!

Expect it some time this week!


P.S.: Download it! It'll be worth it.

Wednesday, March 3, 2010


Hey munds,

I just suffered a life-threatening nostalgia attack and I'm using the next week (roughly) to share some classic Catscan pictures (I stole from Mason) to recover. Check out our facebook fan page to see some incredibly embarrassing pictures of us when we were skinnier, pimplier, and far less pubescent.

I will decide (with the help of my potentially furious colleagues) whether or not to keep these photos up permanently. Just in case you better look at them quick, and while you're at it you might as well join the fan page if you already haven't. Enjoy.


Monday, February 22, 2010


I just spent about two hours (or roughly 20 times) recording takes of the same gentle acoustic guitar solo over and over. I kept screwing it up. The result is nice, though.

However, it must be known : I GOT BLISTERS ON MY FINGERS!!

The new album is in progress and is coming at the end of this year.

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Dope Catscan shirts

For those of you who don't know, our Catscan shirts are dope. The logo always attracts comments from pretty people of the opposite gender, and as such the shirts are great conversation starters. I dont know where you can order them, but I am sure Mason or Paul does!